Reflecting

March 29, 2010 at 4:50 am 7 comments

     Today, on C’s 9th birthday, long after all the gift wrap was trashed, the cards were strewn around the floor, and the cupcakes were all eaten (by the other kids, that is), I thought about how far we’ve come. How far C has come. From a premature and deathly ill infant so overwhelmed by life itself he couldn’t tolerate the noise of his own toys – to a loud, rambunctious, keeping-up-with-the-best-of-them boy at his own party, C’s journey has been a wild ride. 

     There were still snapshots of autism at C’s party –  had I captured a picture of C bending over to lick the frosting off his cupcake because he didn’t want to touch it and pick it up. Or perhaps it would have been obvious in a picture of C and his best friend taken two seconds after C told his friend not to touch him anymore. Or maybe it would have been clear in a picture of C playing with the girls because the boys had probably gotten just a little bit too loud and rambunctious. 

     Probably what was most obvious, however, was the picture someone could have taken of me. No longer did I feel as though I needed to be right in the middle of things in order to protect C and protect others from his “enthusiasm.” He was surrounded by his friends, he was safe, and he was having fun. Morever, so was everyone else. In that moment, I realized how much has changed for me. In the midst of all this chaos that has been my life for the last nine years, there was calm. Entire minutes went by where I didn’t even know where C was or what he was doing. And he was fine.

     Even better, I was fine.

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Entry filed under: autism. Tags: , , , , , , , .

Thank you, Tony Attwood What comes around…

7 Comments Add your own

  • 1. tiredmama  |  March 29, 2010 at 5:43 am

    My eyes teared while I read this. How amazingly awesome! 🙂

    I love this line — “And he was fine. Even better, I was fine.” That speaks volumes to me.

    Happy 9th birthday, C!

    Reply
  • 2. therocchronicles  |  March 29, 2010 at 7:55 am

    Happy 9th C!!! Sounds like he had a great party! I love that last line–gives me such hope that one day I will have a similar experience! 🙂

    Reply
  • 3. Cheryl D.  |  March 29, 2010 at 7:56 am

    Wow! Thanks for sharing. I feel that way with my daughter too–it’s the best! I’m sure you put a ton of hard work over the years that made this day possible. Enjoy.

    Reply
  • 4. abbyschrad  |  March 29, 2010 at 9:53 pm

    Happy Birthday, C! I’m glad that your birthday was such a success.

    Reply
  • 5. lynnes  |  March 30, 2010 at 2:27 pm

    Oh how wonderful!! Happy Birthday to C. I hope we’re not far from a time where I don’t feel like I need to be in the middle of things to protect other kids from G’s enthusiasm. Hearing you’re at that point gives me hope.

    Reply
  • 6. robinaltman  |  March 30, 2010 at 7:03 pm

    That made me tear up. Happy Birthday C. (I admit that I also smiled at the picture of C leaning down to lick the cupcake icing. Bless his little heart.)

    Reply
  • 7. Shivon  |  March 31, 2010 at 8:54 am

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY C!!!!!!! (a little late) Congratulations on the anniversary of his birth and for being such a fantastic mommy.

    Reply

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