It’s a no

September 16, 2008 at 7:43 pm 7 comments

     I am a proud, but also sad, Mommy. C did not get elected to student council. The whole school was sitting in the gymnasium for the assembly, and he was in the back row. As his teacher began to announce the names, I prepared our escape route. I was ready to grab him and run if he completely lost it. But my boy surprised me. He was very upset and disappointed, and he did cry. But he did not make a scene. No outburst, no freak out, no meltdown. He cried for about five minutes and then happily participated in the rest of the assembly activities.

     I’m sad, however, because this was an enormous opportunity for him. An opportunity to get something he can not get from me, his teacher or any therapist. Validation from his peers is something he can get nowhere else, and he probably needs it more than most. As I sat there, watching him cry, I fought back tears myself, not because he didn’t get elected to student council, but because of what being elected would’ve meant to him on a grand scale.

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Entry filed under: autism. Tags: , , , , .

A few hours C-isms, Part VIII

7 Comments Add your own

  • 1. goodmum  |  September 16, 2008 at 7:58 pm

    Oh, I’m teary reading this. My heart is broken for you both. I don’t know C, really, but I’m proud of him all the same. What a tough little guy. GIve him a hug for me! 🙂

    Thanks, friend. It was sad. But, as usual, the sun came up this morning, so all seems well with the world.

    Reply
  • 2. looksgoodinpolkadots  |  September 16, 2008 at 8:31 pm

    I’m so happy for you both that C was so strong for this! Good job! Hopefully he will be ready and willing to take the student body on again next year.

    Yup, it appears that no permanent damage was done, although who knows when it will pop up again! Knowing him, he’ll ponder and discuss it in depth weeks or months from now.

    Reply
  • 3. hopeauthority  |  September 16, 2008 at 11:00 pm

    I demand a recount on C’s behalf!! What a jip!! Surely the thing was fixed…

    Seriously though, I am so sad for C as I can’t imagine the disappointment he felt. But I’ll offer this tidbit in consolation (to be read with a tone of joy not envy):

    You and C are so very lucky that he has come so far as to be able to understand the election process, to feel the emotions of pride, disappointment, and (sadly) rejection, to realize that he has peers and to want their approval.

    Of course the loss was awful. So try to focus on the gain.

    And on the fact that C is a shoo-in when the obviously corrupt winner falls from grace…(LOL)

    Yup, fixed! That’s it! I’m sure that’s what happened…lol! And I do recognize the irony of it all – there was a time when we didn’t know if he’d ever really talk and here he was giving a speech in front of his class. And of course simply being able to experience all of what happened – the excitement, nervousness, sadness – it’s all very precious to us and we just had no idea how he would grow. I never would’ve anticipated his even being in this spot at this point in his life. Which of course makes it all the more profound. It was just a big experience for him (and us) in so many ways…

    Reply
  • 4. mama mara  |  September 17, 2008 at 4:41 am

    Ouch! It’s probably shallow solace to know that he showed himself (and you) that he can deal with disappointment without losing it. But for that alone, he deserves a big BRAVO!

    C is destined for great things, asdmommy! Get ready for the roller coaster ride.

    Yup, it’s true – I was so proud of the way he handled himself. I just didn’t know what to expect and was prepared for the worst. I made a big deal of what a good sport he was.

    And what? It hasn’t already been a roller coaster ride??? You mean there’s MORE!!??!?!? 😉

    Reply
  • 5. Angie  |  September 17, 2008 at 9:02 am

    Oh, that makes me sad. I was thinking of him. That acceptance from peers is tough, no matter the age or situation. I’ve had to watch from afar through three kids and it is the hardest thing as a parent.

    You must be so proud of him…hugs to you both!

    I guess it feels like one of those many, many things you can’t control! But I am really proud of him. He did great.

    Reply
  • 6. pixiemama  |  September 18, 2008 at 8:17 am

    Bah! Forget these puny school elections. I’m holding out for the big presidential position – you know what I mean. C for pres FOR REAL!

    Seriously, I am really amazed at how well he handled the let down. There is something to be said for that!

    🙂
    k

    It’s true – I am very proud of the way he handled it. And who cares? We’re going for bigger and better things now!!! LOL!

    Reply
  • 7. kristi  |  September 22, 2008 at 8:24 am

    Awww…I definitely would have cried too!! Good for him for keeping it together. Shows how far you ALL have come!

    Reply

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