Rules

June 23, 2008 at 6:33 am 4 comments

     C’s life is governed by rules, both his own and the world’s. He finds it difficult to prioritize, generalize and recognize when those rules should be broken. I wish I knew the magic formula to make a rule stick – as we’ve many times tried to create rules (don’t scare the dog) that just don’t seem to make it on his list of rules to live by. It’s his version of selective hearing, I guess.

     Recently he was reading me a book from school, and I noticed he was leaving off the word “and” when it came at the beginning of a sentence. I pointed out he was missing a word, and he said, “You’re not supposed to start a sentence with ‘and,’ so I’m not reading it.” The child has the memory of an elephant, and usually can recite exactly what I said, when I said it, what I was wearing when I said it, and what the weather was doing when I said it. So teaching C the subtleties of why it is okay to break a rule every once in awhile without opening the floodgates is a challenge for which I am sorely unprepared.

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Entry filed under: autism. Tags: , , , , , , , .

Perspective Eyes behind ya

4 Comments Add your own

  • 1. robinaltman  |  June 23, 2008 at 4:43 pm

    Don’t let C read anything I write. I love beginning sentences with “and”.

    I think C will eventually get rules. He’s so concrete, that the world must seem very confusing to him. Your gentle reminders will sink in one day, and when he’s rich and successful you can then make him suffer. And we will admit you all to the Jewish religion. L’ chiam!

    Yes, I do think the world is confusing to him at times. It’s confusing to me, and I’m not nearly as concrete as C! And (see, I do it too!) I’ll look forward to a) him being rich and successful, and b) becoming Jewish. I already eat kosher for the most part; am I halfway there???? 🙂

    Reply
  • 2. looksgoodinpolkadots  |  June 23, 2008 at 8:13 pm

    I second the notion that it’s okay to NOT try to explain breaking the rules.

    LC and I had ONE OF THOSE days today.

    Cheers!

    Jamie

    Uh-oh, one of those days, huh? I’ll have to go check your blog to see what’s going on. I’m on vacation, and on dial-up, so no viewing stuff for me at the moment! I’ll check back in when we get back to civilization. But yes, I tend just to not try to explain breaking the rules at the moment. Just seems safer for everyone involved! 😉 Hang in there…

    Reply
  • 3. Ms. Mc  |  June 24, 2008 at 1:13 am

    Sorry – that would be my fault! I always told them that they might see it in books but that they shouldn’t use it when writing since 1st graders never seem to use it correctly.

    Well, it is correct that you really shouldn’t use the word “and” at the beginning of a sentence, so no harm, no foul! It’s just hard to teach him the hows and whens of breaking rules. It was actually pretty funny – can’t remember the book, but it had lists of things, so many, many “ands” at the beginning of sentences…

    Reply
  • 4. FXSmom  |  June 24, 2008 at 3:23 pm

    Matty’s life is ruled by rules as well. He lets all of us know when we are breaking them. If we ignore him he just gets louder and more annoying until we fix the rule we broke…lol

    Boy, does that sound familiar….I just did a 12 hour drive with C and he let me know every time I went over (or under) the speed limit! 🙂

    Reply

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