Let me tell you ’bout the birds and the bees

May 10, 2008 at 1:24 am 1 comment

     C is very simple. It’s quite complicated really, but in essence, he is very simple. Everyone is a potential friend, and he rarely holds anything against anyone. Just this morning, he said hi to a little girl in his class (the one who used to call here all the time but doesn’t anymore, see here) as we walked onto the playground. He says hi to her every day. She never says anything back, but instead runs away giggling with her friends. I realized he has been caught up in something he doesn’t yet understand.

     This little girl’s actions really bother me. It seems to me to be too young to have this silly kind of interaction. Momma Bear that I am, I went to talk to her in line and asked her how she’s doing, and did she hear C saying hi to her this morning? I knew she’d be blunt in her response, and she said something about not wanting to be C’s girlfriend all the time. My response about just being friends with everyone, boy or girl, I’m pretty sure fell on deaf ears. Or perhaps just 7 year old girl ears.

     As I marveled at the sophisticated, albeit annoying, antics of children these days, I started to feel old. Really old. I am pretty sure I was oblivious to all of that until much later. Perhaps it is my memories that are oblivious, but I don’t remember talking about “cooties” until far later than these years. Just like C doesn’t seem to see skin color or weight differences or anything else (he thinks I look like his new gym teacher, who is about 8 inches shorter and has a completely different color hair, but it’s LONG, so there’s his connection), he certainly knows nothing about the complicated world that is boy-girl relationships.

     We talked as we walked in about how good friends treat each other, and he said that perhaps this little girl is shy. I smiled, because she is anything but shy, but loved that C was trying to figure out a reason without holding it against her in any way. I’m not sure what will happen down the road, but for the moment he seemed happy to let it all go.

     As I walked away from the school, I was reminded of kindergarten last year, in a very different school, in a very different town, where all the girls had to be reminded to put their cell phones away before class started. They talked about their Christmas vacations in Paris and I felt the sharp contrast between their worldliness and C’s, and wondered if he would ever find his place among these children. I guess kids just grow up faster these days.

     C’s innocence is part of his charm, and once again I counted my lucky stars to have this child, this boy as my own.

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Entry filed under: autism. Tags: , , , , , , , , .

Another few moments in time Musings on Mothers

1 Comment Add your own

  • 1. awalkabout  |  May 10, 2008 at 8:51 am

    It’s true. As I’ve played chaperone to class field trips over the years, it amazes me how much more sophisticated the children are so much younger now, and how much peer pressure there is to be “in the clique” even in first and second grade. Fortunately perhaps my kids are somewhat oblivious to the existence of the clique in the first place–they could care less.

    It’s kind of scary, really. I’m astounded at what kids know already. It’s hard to imagine what high school will be like by the time C gets there….not ready! Not ready!

    Reply

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